So many times throughout each week I say things like, “Trust the process” and “Enjoy the journey.” I’ve adopted those philosophies for basically everything.

So much of life is out of our control. There are hundreds of thousands of unknowns at any given time; and if we wanted to, we could really go crazy focusing in on all of them.

For a long time (and still every now and then) I did focus in on those out of my control unknowns. I tried to find ways to control them. Ways to understand them. Ways to figure it out. And then I realized that was ridiculous because I was trying to control the uncontrollable. Predict the future. Change the past. Hold onto things that can’t be held.

It’s not a good way to do life.

It leads to anxiety, distress, frustration, anger, confusion, and unhealthy, unhelpful behaviors to help cope with it all.

So now, even when the process doesn’t seem to be going smoothly, or doesn’t even make sense at all, I tell myself-just as I tell others in my life, “Trust the process. Enjoy the journey.”

And friends, I just want you to know that life gets so much better when we do that.

All I know for sure in this life is that everything I don’t know or understand, God does. Everything that’s out of my control, God’s got it. Everything I can’t see, God sees it.

The thing that amazes me the most about this is that every single time, and I do mean every time, without fail, God always shows up. In the midst of confusion and frustration and uncertainty, a breakthrough comes. Or, a breakthrough doesn’t come but I find peace and joy through it anyway. Throughout every minute of my life, I can look back and see God’s hand covering every single piece of it.

There is nothing in my story so far that’s been particularly smooth or simple. In many areas of my life, I did everything “the wrong way.”

But even at the lowest points and the darkest moments of my journey, underneath the heaviness and pain and disappointment; hidden behind the shame and the disgust I carried around for myself; right next to my fear and doubt and angst was a still small voice that said, “Trust the process.”

So I did.

I’ve trusted the process.

The messy points. The times I’ve screwed up. The points I failed. The days I felt like I wasn’t enough. The weeks I seem to do nothing but fall. The seasons of uncertainty where nothing seems clear and everything feels foggy. The moments I want to give up completely.

Through all of that, I have and will continue to trust the process.

Despite the messy and the ugly, I feel the light God placed inside me long ago burning. I have held onto hope through moments of hopelessness. When it makes no sense to have hope, God says to me, “Trust the process. Enjoy the journey.”

When others have had negative opinions about how the journey looks. When it would’ve been easier to give into the shame for how I’ve gone about certain things. When I want to resolve myself to, “Well, this is just the way it is.” God whispers into my soul, “Child, enjoy the journey. Trust the process. Trust me.”

And so I do.

I’m not in control. I don’t have the answers to all the questions. I keep screwing it up. I still have doubts. I still struggle. It’s still messy.

But one thing I know for sure is that God has got this.

Right now, I look at my life and am so unbelievably overwhelmed with gratitude for what it is that it quite literally takes my breath away. As I watch the journey unfold before me, I am awe-struck by what God has done for me and what He continues to do. I am captivated by the details and being able to see the intricacies of His hand guiding my path.

It is because He is guiding the path that I am able to trust the process and enjoy the journey.

When I am trying to control it, there’s no enjoyment in that. When I am striving to make things work in my own strength, my trust is weak and my faith wanes.

When I give it over to Him; when I lay it down; when I trust the process and just enjoy the journey, He takes every failure and every mistake and He uses them to create something more beautiful than I could have ever imagined. When I open my hands and say, “God I don’t know, but you do. I trust you;” He showers me with love and grace that overwhelms my soul.

My past is a part of my story. Without those broken pieces, I wouldn’t have the beautiful life I have unfolding before me now. Without every single thing that’s happened; good, bad and ugly, the person I am today wouldn’t exist.

This still messy, but no longer broken, woman filled with hope and gratitude and joy would’ve been lost to the story if it weren’t for God reminding me to always trust the process and enjoy the journey.

Because of that, my life is just beginning. The journey continues to unfold. The process continues to have its flaws. But every step is beautiful. I don’t know where it all ends, but I do know that each day is a new chance for it to begin.

So no matter what part of the journey you are on, just trust the process. God’s got this. The rest is history.

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