You Know You Belong to Boys When…

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I’ve written before about life with 3 wild angels for children, and this won’t be the last time. There’s no shortage of posts out there about the reality of raising boys, so this may not be a brain shocker or brand new information, but I still thought I’d share my own little list. I also know that with my nuggets only being 2 and 9 months, I’m in for a MUCH larger and more interesting list as the years go by; but there are some things about boys that hold true no matter how old they are. Here’s just a few of the regulars that remind me on a daily basis, “Yep, I’m a mom of 3 wild boys!”

You know you’re a mom of boys when…

1. You slip on a toy car (or some other toy like a Lego, plastic animal, etc.) in the bathroom in the middle of the night at least a few times a week.

2. You have to bathe The Hulk along with all 3 boys. (Don’t forget to dry him off too!)

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3. You Laugh hysterically at every fart noise you hear…and even initiate the laughter when your son lets one out. Sometimes you might even do a little “fartnin” yourself just for some comedic relief. I wouldn’t…but you might.

4. Most everything is covered in some type of sticky substance, especially bodies.

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5. Seeing them play with their penis relentlessly doesn’t phase you at all.

6.Poop is a regular topic of conversation and is celebrated for its size and stink.

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Yes, that’s an actual poop ball. You’re welcome.

7. You pick boogers with your bare hands, accept them as gifts, and wipe them on your clothes if you have no other options available…and it doesn’t bother you. What’s one more gross thing on your clothes!?

8. Wrestling matches are awesome and happen multiple times a day…often started by you.

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9. You run almost everywhere you go.

10. You find yourself saying things like, “Don’t throw things right at people’s faces buddy. Wait til we get outside. Don’t climb on that please. Be careful. Watch out for your brother! Yes, you have to wear clothes.” And lots of other awesome, otherwise socially inappropriate things.

11. Clothes for the boys are unnecessary and butt naked little imps are running around everywhere. Basically you’ve completely given up on dressing anyone unless you have to go somewhere.

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12. As an extension of the previous point, you find yourself making deals with your children about how long they have to leave on their clothes and when they can get naked again.

13. You operate on a much higher octave of noise than most people and loud noises don’t hinder anything for you…conversations, phone calls, dinner, etc..and you are confused why other people seem bothered.

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14. Privacy, cleanliness, showers, or things that are your own, to include your own body? What’s that!!?!??

15. Children jumping from high places and climbing on inappropriate household items no longer scares you.

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16. You hear a bang and wait a few seconds for the cry to determine if it’s necessary to acknowledge what happened. Unless it’s the bad cry, you just give it a kiss and get back out there.

17. You are frequently tackled with hugs. And it’s one of your favorite things in the world.

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18. You look forward to playing outside because a) it keeps them occupied and they can run off their energy without hurting things in the house, b) you love watching them play and playing with them, c) the dirt and sweatΒ has become a standard staple in your outfit and you miss it if it’s not there for a day.

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19. You go through a gallon of milk every day…2 days at the most.

20. You’ve released all delusions of a whole foods only, no junk food diet for your kids. Although I do have to say my boys love some great foods like sweet potatoes, broccoli, cabbage, cauliflower, and green beans. God be praised!

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Bowl of baked cauliflower for a snack.

21. As an addendum to the above, you’ve begun to consider a good meal to be anything that has some kind of starch and fat in it, and cheese is a primary staple in your house….cheese balls, cheese crackers, macaroni and cheese, cheese of any kind. Some nights I’m pleased if they ate a bowl of feta cheese and drank some ranch. This is not a joke! Bless!

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Literally drinking ranch.

22. You have at least 100 balls of every kind in your house, and every room has 5 or more balls in it at all times.

23. Spills often turn into picnics.

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24. Your boys request to sleep with items such as golf balls and super hero figurines.

25.Super hero pajamas and Halloween costumes are an absolute favorite and can double as an outfit.

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26. You have one speed: GO! And you work from son up to son down.

27. When you hear them wake up, you wait a few minutes before getting them so you can breathe and prepare yourself for the energy you’re about to expend.

28. The silliness truly never stops, and you’re good with that!

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29. You are exhausted at the end of every day, but can’t wait to do it all again the next day.

30. You’ve never felt so loved and so full of joy in all of your life, and you feel blessed beyond all comprehension.

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40 thoughts on “You Know You Belong to Boys When…

  1. Love it! I have 3 boys and totally can relate! What’re they gonna do during the winter months? Or are they unaware of temperature changes and are content to be in diapers throughout the year? πŸ™‚

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    • Haha good question. This will be their first winter living somewhere cold. We’ve been here in Kentucky for Christmas every year but just to visit, so now that they’ll experience a whole winter I’m not sure what they’ll do. Maybe I’ll be able to convince then to wear clothes, or the heat may be enough to keep then ok inside haha. It’ll be interesting!
      And I’m sure you’ve got some great things to add to this list with your adorable crew!! ☺

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  2. Awww boys! I have one of my own he just turned one last month along with his twin sister. So this is what I will be expecting, bring it on!. Oh he is already touching his penis and laughing every time, the joys of having boys.

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  3. Love, love, love this!!! It’s so hilariously true! My daughter actually fits a lot of these, because she’s exceptionally high energy and rambunctious, but I’m seeing pretty much all of it now that my boy is past two. LOL

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    • Haha thanks. Yes, if I can even get them dressed (which is usually only to go somewhere) then as soon, and I do mean as soon, As we get home, they’re saying, “Mommy I wanna be butt naked” and the clothes are a memory! At least it’s summer and hey, if I were 2 and unashamed and looked that cute in just a diaper, I’d be naked all the time too! Haha

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  4. Bahaha!!! LOVE this!! I am already starting to relate to so many of these with just my one son. My daughter is the complete stereotypical girly girl and I was in quite some shock when my little baby first started taking on some of these “boy” characteristics. I am slowly getting used to them. My daughter simply shakes her head at him and sighs “That Pierce!” πŸ™‚

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  5. Your post is hilariously true! I couldn’t stop laughing and could think of several instances when my two boys have done everything on your list. Thanks so much for sharing.

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  6. 1. My girls are savages. They belch in public, proudly. No apologies. Their mom wonders out loud about their ability to find a mate later in life. I wonder if they’re attracting attention from boys who value a girl who can belt out a good belch.

    2. Maybe I am raising boys in disguise. The running thing here applied, to a certain age. Now everything moves slowly. Except for the 9-year-old. She runs, and we all yell at her when she goes so far, because we’re all so slow-moving now.

    3. The danger factor never goes away, does it? Love the picture of the car on the stool! The stair railing seems to hold some allure for my girls. As does full-contact wrestling. Especially when it spills over furniture and a third kid gets involved solely to get in some cheap shots.

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    • Oh that’s awesome, thank you!!! Boys are the best huh!!? Last night one of my boys accidentally peed on my youngest and tonight they wanted to see each other’s poop as I changed diapers and we’re laughing saying, “I see you hiney!!!” The fun never ends lol

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